I live, work, and share a life with my partner, family and friends in this beautiful, diverse, tolerant community.

I now find myself in a difficult circumstance because my legal rights in life depend on canvassing support within my community to participate in a postal survey that inappropriately is likely to determine whether I am afforded the same rights in law as you.

This is important to me because until there is marriage equality -

• I am a second-class citizen;

• I am not automatically the next of kin to the person I share my life and resources with especially in the case of a medical emergency;

• my death certificate will say Born, Died, with nothing in between, so in effect I will be written out of my own history. 

I did not choose to be same-sex attracted. My sexual orientation is as normal to me as I am sure yours is to you. The difference though is society celebrates the heterosexual version of relationships while at best, ignores mine. At worst, society actively vilifies mine.

Over the past 35 years this has caused me great personal grief, discrimination and abuse. As a young person this caused me to hide and be ashamed of who I was. Over the years community attitudes have changed and life has become easier, however the debating of my most personal relationship in all forms of media is now having a personal cost and taken me back to that time in life where everything was a fight.

Marriage equality is the last hurdle to me to be accepted as an equal, contributing member of society. Our fight for rights are similar to the fight for the equalities afforded by progress and enlightenment to woman, indigenous communities and African Americans. My community though is small in number and with an unwanted postal survey being forced upon us we cannot achieve equal rights alone.

What I do know is that this survey is only asking whether or not I should have the right to enter into a marriage contract in law. A contract that determines kinship, property arrangements, taxation considerations, superannuation, pensions and other benefits to name a few. Marriage equality in a secular society does not impact religious freedom nor would I want it to. But we are a secular society and it is wrong for the belief systems of some to curtail the human rights of others.

Marriage equality has absolutely nothing to do with children as lobby groups such as The Australian Christian Lobby would lead you to believe; on the contrary, marriage is seen as something that strengthens relationships and therefore the security and well being of children that are already in same-sex families. Decades of research tells us this. Children thrive with loving parents, regardless of their sexuality.

I did not want this public debate and survey about my most personal relationship. It is deeply hurtful to me that our land of fairness and freedom has opted to decide whether or not I am afforded the same rights in law as others enjoy by a non-binding, non-compulsory postal survey.

This matter might be minor to you but it means the world to me.

Linda Pigott

Bellingen